Here’s to the women who have used and abused us. Here’s to lesbians, because they have good taste.ģ8. Here’s to doing and drinking, not sitting and thinking.įriends standing on river bank with beer Photo: Emma Innocenti(Getty Images)ģ7. To hell: May the stay there be as fun as the way there.ģ6. May all your ups and downs be between the sheets.Īnd here’s to the girls who say they never will,ģ5. Cheers to beers and legs behind your ears.ģ3. May our penises always be harder than our lives.ģ2. So let’s all get drunk and go to heaven.ģ1. I want to thank you all for coming, especially my parents, years ago.ģ0. Here’s to the women who love me terribly. Women friends toasting with shots at a bar Photo: Sam Diephuis (Getty Images)Ģ7. Here’s to those who wish us well, all the rest can go to hell. But a whiskey glass and a fat girl’s ass are home sweet home to me.Ģ6. A rich man lives in a castle, a poor man lives by the sea. Better to be a well-known drunkard than an anonymous alcoholic.Ģ4. So let’s get wasted all of the time, and have the time of our life.Ģ2. Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life. Here’s to staying positive and testing negative.Ģ1. To your genitalia: May they never fail ya, or jail ya.Ģ0. To the kisses we’ve snatched, and vice versa.ġ9. Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives … and to the “good life,” whatever it is and wherever it happens to be. Take everything in moderation - including moderation.ġ6. Not the heat that brings down barns and shanties, but the heat that brings down bras and panties.ġ4. There’s not another creature on heaven, earth, or hell, that can take the juice from the nut without cracking the shell.ġ3. So fine and divine, they bleed every month, and bear every nine. “I’d like to say a little prayer for world peace.” -Phil Connorsġ2. (Sinatra)įriends Toasting Wineglasses During Party Photo credit: Mirko Vitali / EyeEm (Getty Images)ġ1. Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. The liver is evil and must be punished.Ĩ. To the new couple: Never sweat the petty things, but always pet the sweaty things.ħ. And vodka makes you not remember any of that crap.Ħ. Here’s to the women, with little pink shoes who steal all our money and drink all our booze now, she’s not a virgin but that’s not a sin, cause she’s still got the box that the cherry came in.ĥ. I would rather be with the people in this room than with the finest people I know.Ĥ.
Group of friends celebrating with champagne Photo credit: Flashpop(Getty Images)ģ. To the three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. Calm your nerves, sit back, and let’s all laugh about the unique experience that is starting a new job.2. Now, without further ado, let’s see some of the best memes about your first day on the job. Not only do you have something to prove, but you want to show your skills as quickly and as soon as possible. The first day on a new job is scary for anyone, from recent graduates to seasoned executives. We want to tell you that these questions and feelings of uncertainty are absolutely normal. What if I get lost on my way? What should I wear? Does this count as business casual? What if I don’t like my coworkers, or worse yet, what if they don’t like me? What if I’m in way over my head?
It’s like the first day of high school all over again.Īnd above all that, there are just so many thoughts racing through your mind on the first day. Firstly, it can be quite intimidating, getting used to a new commute, walking into a new building, being introduced and meeting new colleagues. The first days on a new job are definitely an interesting time. These first day on the job memes are not only hilarious, but they accurately describe our feelings of the first day on a new job. Can this feeling be put more succinctly than on a meme? We tend to think not.
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